Maturing

Hey everyone~ I know I said there wasn't gonna be a blog today, but, I decided to let you all know there isn't gonna be a blog for a while. I think I've pulled a Rocky II where he lets the hype and attention divert his focus. So, I'm going back to the basics and seeing what that helps. Any one of you are more than welcome to contact me any time to see how things are going. It isn't that I don't want to keep you updated. I just need to re-focus on things....and get my attention off of my bench and off of my numbers. I'm going to ask Brian that he not tell me my numbers from now until much closer to time for my meet. I think it will help me to relax more and not be so worried about whether or not my bench went up every day. So, Thanks to all of you for your faithfulness in following me. :-) I'll be back some time. I just have some more maturing to do....mentally.

Special Request

I slept about 4 1/2 hours last night...tops. I took two TRAC tests cuz the first one was absolutely awful. So, I waited till I could relax and took another one which turned out good. However, I special requested that Brian not give me my numbers for today. It's safe to assume that the amount of sleep I had + the reaction of Brian after my lift = not even remotely close to where I should or want to be. I have been really working on getting better mentally and not holding on to past workouts. I've been trying to focus on each individual workout as a new one with new expectations and new possible outcomes. So, I didn't want to take what I had a feeling was one of the world's worst lifts and put it in my brain for storage. I'm trying to make better decisions about things and keep some pressure off myself. I think it's helping. I just don't have it down-pat yet. I'm getting there. :) I'm hoping Sunday will be an upstairs day to go over some things, so, there might not be a blog. Everyone have a great weekend!!!!!!!!!

Weight. Not Volume.

So, today my TRAC said I was pretty stressed out so we backed off 'all unnecessary volume' and did a little heavier weight with my rows and such.

Oscillating Bench - 135 lbs., 150 lbs., 155 lbs., all for 2. RPE 9.

Cambered Bar Rows p 85 lbs., 105 lbs., for 5. 115 lbs., for 4.

Dumbbell Rows - 35 lbs., 40 lbs., 50 lbs., all for 5.

Facedown Lateral Raises - 12 lbs., 6. 15 lbs., 2 sets of 6.

Sidebends - 3 sets of 20, each side.

<3 Stretching <3

4-Count Pause

WELL!!!!!! I feel soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo much better!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I stopped drinking Almond Milk and I'm almost completely back to normal!!! YAAAAAAAAY!!!!!!!!!!! I'm not sure what it was about the Almond Milk, but, as Brian always says, "Are you feelin' good? Then just go with it." I certainly will!!!!!!! Today we hit Competition Bench but increased my pause to a 4-count! Trying to get me through that sticky/slow spot a couple inches off my chest.

Pretty sure my RPE was 9 today.

4-Count Competition Bench - 95 lbs., 135 lbs., 145 lbs., 155 lbs., 150 lbs., all for 3.

Dumbbell Bench - 40 lb.s, 50 lbs., 55 lbs., 50 lbs., all for 6.

Triceps Pullover/Press - 55 lbs., 65 lbs., 6. 80 lbs., 5. I like these a lot!!!

Lateral Raises - 12 lbs., 3 sets of 10. These felt really great.

Seated Goodmornings - 3 sets of 8, we didn't use a band today.

<3 Stretching <3

Training As Normal

Before I started this TRAC program, I don't think I realized how important recovery methods were. Of course, when something hurts I ice it and I get regular massages. But, when my CNS shows up stressed on this program, it will suggest implementing recovery methods.....and IT WORKS!!!!!!!! SOOOO, I have just started implementing them to begin with and for the second half of this week, my TRAC has said "continue training as normal." YAY!!!!!

Low-Rows - 60 lbs., 70 lbs., 80 lbs., 90 lbs. 12, 10, 8, 6, respectively.

Cable Iron Cross - 20 lbs., 3 sets of 12.

Pullovers - 30 lbs., 3 sets of 10. We set up over the Low Row bench today instead of the regular bench....and I REALLY liked it!! :) I think I like both ways, it just felt real good to switch it up. :)

<3 Stretching <3 We stretched over one of the leg machines today. My IT Band is REALLY tight and it REALLY helped to switch that up too!!! :)

I Get It

Brian has always said to me "Relax." That's his answer....probably upward of 85% of the time. It has really frustrated me most of the time because I didn't know how...and I also didn't think it was an answer to much of anything. .....Now I get it. Finally....after (almost) 2 years. I get it.

I try to force things to happen. I want things so badly that I try to produce (or reproduce) things, instead of just letting them happen naturally. I want to be mentally strong so badly that I try to force myself to be mentally strong. I want to have a 200 lb bench so badly that I try to force myself to have a 200 lb. bench. I try to have all my ducks nice and neat in a row. I've been so frustrated for the last month because every time I benched I did everything I was taught to do...lats & scaps tight, white knuckles on the bar, elbows tucked, pull chest up on the way down, push it away on the way up, pull the bar apart, stay tight all the way through, hold your breah, don't move, lock it in on the handoff to produce extra stability......the list goes on and on. I did every thing every time and it produced nothing. I was trying to make myself bench instead of letting myself bench. I was trying to force myself to be stronger & to be perfectly stable instead of letting myself do it.

THAT'S what he meant!!!!!!!!!!!!! Just let it be what it will be and let the chips fall where they may. Sure there are certain things that you have to learn and you have to know and keep in order, but, every thing isn't gonna go every time. And if you let it go and let it happen, even when every thing isn't right on, you just might make the lift anyway. ;-)

Today I asked him if I was pausing long enough on my bench and if I was holding my scaps evenly on my military press. I could tell both times he wanted to smack me and tell me to RELAX. But, he didn't. He came up with new answers with longer explanations.....But it still meant relax, just the same. haha. I smiled and agreed and didn't ask anything else....cuz I finally get it. Just let your natural juices flow...give your body and your muscle memory a little credit, Chelsi. Just do it because you know how, not because you need practice cuz you're afraid to do it wrong. Let it be what it will be.

I am reading this book right now called 'The Mind Gym.' It says "The probability of achieving the outcome you want increases when you let go of the need to have it." ~ I don't know how I did this....but this is finally the realization that I came to. It's a REAL hard one. You're afraid to let go for fear that letting go will keep it from happening...but just the opposite takes place. It's finally free to turn out in your favor. My fear elimination therapist gave me this example a couple of weeks ago. She said "Think of things like sand. If you grab a hand full of sand and you squeeze real tight to try to hold onto it, almost all of the sand will fall out from between your fingers. But, if you keep your hand open and hold it gently, all the sand will stay, and you may even be able to open your fingers a little bit without losing any sand." ...Isn't that cool?!

Today went extremely well. I only went up to 165 but it felt so much better. Much MUCH better. I just let it be what it was gonna be and it felt very good. I certainly didn't let my form fall all to pieces, but, I just quit thinking about it and just did it. I stopped trying to force myself and just trusted that I would. So, I did.

Competition Bench - 135 lbs., 145 lbs., 155 lbs., 165 lbs., 155 lbs.(2 sets), all for doubles. RPE was 9.

Close Grips with a board - 135 lbs., 155 lbs., 145 lbs.(2 sets) all for 6.

Cambered Bar Shrugs - 95 lbs., 12. 115 lbs., 10. 125 lbs., 8.

Dumbbell Military Press - 25 lbs., 30 lbs., 35 lbs., all for 10.

Shoulder Horn - 8 lbs., 2 sets of 15.

Chops - 40 lbs., 3 sets of 12, each side.

<3 Stretching <3

It was a GREAT day. :-)

R-E-L-I-E-F

Well, you all know my sister finally gave birth on Sunday. Isn't he completely adorable!!!!!!!! (I'm not bias or anything. haha.) AND....GUESS WHAT?!?!?! ....Today was a training day!!!!!!! :-D Love training days.

We did a new drill today. Oscillatory Competition Bench. I came down & held the competition 2-count...then I went up a few inches off my chest and back down and then all the way up. Brian has on my paper 'oscillate at FCD', but, I have no idea what that means. lol. I do know it is to teach me to break through my sticking point though. :-) My TRAC reading today said that my body was under a lot of stress, and suggested we not do any unnecessary volume. So we didn't do any drop sets. Here are the numbers:

RPE was 9.

Oscillatory Competition Bench - 95 lbs., 135 lbs., 140 lbs., all for 4.

Cambered Bar Rows - 65 lbs., 85 lbs., 95 lbs., 100 lbs., all for 6.

Dumbbell Rows - 30 lbs., 3 sets of 6.

Facedown Lateral Raises - 10 lbs., 3 sets of 10.

Side Bends - 2 sets of 20, each side.

<3 Stretching <3 .....Missed this!!!!!!!