Stress

I'm not a holiday fan. I was traumatized by Santa (or the lack thereof) and this hasn't really been my favorite time of year since. Most any and all holidays screw with my schedule and I'm not ever a fan of that. I live my daily life seeing most all the people that I want to see and being where I want to be and that usually ceases to be on holidays. Makes me unhappy. It also stresses everyone out b/c they think they have to get all these gifts for everyone. It shouldn't be a 'have to' thing. It should be a 'want to' thing. I always have someone, usually every year, that I go overboard on, because I really want to and it makes me happy to do for them. Everyone else I just usually stick to one gift b/c it feels more like a 'have to' thing. I think we should all just get together instead of stressing out for a month and a half over all the things we 'have to do and get' before Christmas. My saving grace on Christmas is Christmas night when my dad's brothers' families come over. It's so much fun. It's probably my favorite thing we do on any holiday. That's why I still have everyone over for my birthday. I like having everyone at my house just hanging out.

Anywho...I was feeling a bit stressed today. Brian was a bit stressed today as well. And a few other people I saw during the course of the day. And it just got me thinkin' about that. I'm done with Christmas shopping so that's not really why I was feeling stressed...but it just seems that this time of year stresses people out.

Today started out about the same as yesterday...but it ended just as well. I think that everything with training changes so much that it's very hard to find things that work and be able to stick with them. The amount of weight I'm doing has a great effect on what I'm doing and how stable I am. Every time it changes, so does my balance. And, positioning with me is extremely crucial. And it's very hard to get that exact position every time. So, day to day something that worked yesterday doesn't work today and it will probably work again tomorrow. Brian and I hadn't run into this all that often...but, it's coming up more frequently. So, I'm going through another major adjustment period with another realm of him seeing me in vulnerable positions and things being harder for me to do. I'll be just fine, I just need to get through it. I need him to test my limits and make me do new things and different things and things I don't want to do. I just need him to hang in there while I adjust. I'm not eluding to anything like he might not. I'm pretty positive he will. I'm just saying it 'out loud', cuz I guess it's a fear in me from before. I get a little over worried that I am too much to handle when you put together everything he has to do for me and add on top of it my attitude when I'm scared or embarrassed. I probably make it worse by worrying about it so much. Past hurts can be a killer to work through. But, I love the workouts that he puts together for me...even though I might not necessarily prefer all the exercises. Everything is working and I'm getting stronger.

We had trouble with me sliding a bit with rows at first. But, we worked it out. And my cousin Darlene is making me more straps, so, everything should work out just fine once we get those. And, I started back on my drills that I was doing when I first came to Brian and he was switching up my technique. I hang bands from the bar and hang the weights from the bands. That way it sways and makes it very hard to control, so it teaches me to stay tight. It worked before. So, I figured that was the best solution if the problem really is that I was having trouble with balance while I was benching yesterday. Good days are the solution to bad days, so we'll figure that out as they come. And, after all of that is fixed, if there's still a problem we can examine the diet.

Cambered Bar Rows - 95 lbs., 12. 105 lbs., 8, 7. 95 lbs., 10.
Dumbbell Rows (single arm) - 35 lbs., 22 & 20.
HAD to edit this!! I FORGOT SHRUGS!! How dare I forget shrugs!! LOVE shrugs. Did 95 lbs., 3 sets of 12.
Commando Chin-Ups - 2 sets of 8 and a set of 5.
Face-down Inclined Lateral Raises - 15 lbs., 3 sets of 12.
Inclined Cable Bicep Curls - 30 lbs., 12. 40 lbs., 2 sets of 12. These worked out really well. He strapped me in very good. Still hard on the abs, but I think a third strap around the belly will fix that...unless he doesn't want to and wants to give me a good ab workout at the same time. It doesn't really matter :)
Chops - 30 lbs., 3 sets of 15.

Stretching! :) Thank you for always stretching me, Brian. :)